Ultimately choosing a child over a man

I watched the series Alley McBeal & I wondered as it was nearing the end of the series...that child-her daughter, from donating an egg to pay for her schooling; the premise is real enough, I've seen ads in various newspapers but. After all the twists & turns with Billy, after all those dates....to hear her narrate it I KNEW, & I must say I was disappointed, it's a choice many women are forced to make because of the standards of what it is to be men & how men are expected to behave & relate, & what is expected of women, what is discouraged & encouraged of women. "The girls who made the pregnancy pact — some of whom, according to Sullivan, reacted to the news that they were expecting with high fives and plans for baby showers — declined to be interviewed. So did their parents. But Amanda Ireland, who graduated from Gloucester High on June 8, thinks she knows why these girls wanted to get pregnant. Ireland, 18, gave birth her freshman year and says some of her now pregnant schoolmates regularly approached her in the hall, remarking how lucky she was to have a baby. "They're so excited to finally have someone to love them unconditionally," Ireland says. "I try to explain it's hard to feel loved when an infant is screaming to be fed at 3 a.m."
Schools Superintendent Christopher Farmer told WBZ's Bill Shields Thursday the girls had "an agreement to get pregnant."

"Farmer said these are generally "girls who lack self-esteem and have a lack of love in their life."

"The common threat is the lack of self-esteem and purpose in life, and a lack of a sense of direction," said Farmer. "Young women wanting and needing affection."

Alienation is a good word to ponder here, the old models for men & women aren't working anymore. Men need to accept that they're Human & have a whole spectrum of feelings & this is normal. Women need to see more of life & drop the frenemy crap; dropping the permanent cheerful smile too many habitually wear-even while describing a car that jumped the sidewalk & plowed into people is so far beyond having a connection-emotionally-to what was witnessed it is clearly an insincere 'cheerful happy face'. I have seen a few stories on my local news & that is what I saw, those smiling women describing a frightening event. It's okay to feel afraid, it's normal to be sad sometimes, it's healthy to feel bitter, especially if you've suffered through a traumatizing event; covering & denying such feelings can do real damage. I don't want men to be little more than a sperm donor & an atm, I personally don't want to be 'arm candy', a 'cactus', or someone you get rid of when times are good again.

The Cultural Ideals are the places to challenge this failing status quo, otherwise women will continue to choose children & dogs/cats over men because men keep spending more than 50% of their time with their boyfriends instead of their girlfriends or wives. Some men make fun of women who take their dogs to work-well she can't take her boyfriend to work, last I checked there was no Take Your Boyfriend To Work Day, but there is a Take Your Child To Work Day-would he even go if there were?

This is why I was disappointed with Alley McBeal because ultimately she did what most women are resigned to do, choose children & animals because they are more emotionally satisfying for women; they never found him, the one who wouldn't leave you guessing where you stood with him, the one who didn't sidestep when it got difficult-whether it's breast cancer, ms, car accident....they never found him, is he real?